Who is supporting Who now?

Having spent quite a part of my "career" being "technically" supported, and "tech"SQLly supporting I can say with full confidence that by no means is tech support immune to exhibiting computer stupidity of their own. 


This website suggested by my good friend Santosh Banarjee consists of stories from the other side of the phone. Gentlemen and Gentle-womens of the tech savy world - Tech support dumbness presented to you for your perusal.


The one that i liked the best and a thing I have faced with Sony Ericsson mobile phone customer care personally...Getting things done the tech support way...

• Customer: "My laptop won't boot."
• Tech Support: "Have you tried rebooting?"
• Customer: "I can't reboot, because it doesn't boot in the first place."
• Tech Support: "Sir, we have to do things my way, okay?"

Sound off in the comments regarding any personal experiences....

The shorter it is, the sweeter it is.!

This is the first of my many blog posts to come, recommending a websites that I have found interesting and which you may too.


First in this list is a website to which at one point of time I was a regular contributor - Espresso Stories .  I stumbled across this website when a friend and I wanted to find a page which had a collection of short stories which we could read to while away some time at work, not like we had a lot of free time, thus the search for a short story website ;) .... and boy oh boy with this website we had hit the jackpot.  Here the stories aren't just short, they're just a sentence or two, totaling 25 words or less. Less hard-and-fast - but, equally vital are a theme, plot, characters, and narrative development. Everything you'd see in any good story - but short enough to fit into the time it takes to reach the bottom of that bitter little cup, as you ponder on how even the briefest experiences can make life more meaningful.


It explores a literary form for today's frothed-up, on-the-hoof, want-it-all-now consumer lifestyle: complete stories that take no longer to read than an espresso takes to slurp.  It's inspired by Augusto Monterroso's famous story, 'The Dinosaur'. 


Below are a list of stories that i had once published on this website.  You can also read them directly at the website here.  Please to go through them and let me know what ya think in the comments.


What would be more fantastic is if i inspired a few of you folks to contribute to this beautiful method of story telling.  If you do, please sound off in the comments so that we can all read your tiny work of art and enjoy!!!


'The "Mac" Shall Inherit the earth.....' 
by Arvind Vimal David


A million bitten apples lit up simultaneously all over the planet....
"Another planet touched!" smirked the Bespectacled Black turtleneck wearing Android.


'The "Mac" Shall Inherit the earth.....II' 
by Arvind Vimal David


More RAM, a New Graphic card, in retrospective, a huge mistake. As we watched the Macs take over the     world...


'Rehab....' 
by Arvind Vimal David


The drug was never the addiction.
  It was just a replacement for his addiction to her.


'Master of the Obvious.....' 
by Arvind Vimal David


No Make up, No heavy Paint, No red shiny nose, I didn't need all that to realize that my boss was a   clown.


'Lux Æterna....' 
by Arvind Vimal David


The Muted light lit his face, a cold wind ruffled his hair."Love you to bits" he thought, as he arranged her    pieces once again.


'Meanwhile....' 
by Arvind Vimal David


"Die Disembodied hand" shouted Ted and chopped the mysterious hand in his fridge
      
Meanwhile,Sara screamed as she removed her bloody stump from her fridge. 


Hope you enjoyed those little stories, a few more which were written by my good friend Amta a.k.a. Ashwin Raj....


'Oh no, she didn't.....' 
by Ashwin Calvin


“She won’t do it”, he thought.
     “She wouldn’t dare. No, of course she wouldn’t. It isn’t logical after all”. He calmed down.

      She did it.


'That Sinking feeling...' 
by Ashwin Calvin


The worst things in life isn't getting fired or breaking up.

       Its the anticipation which precedes it.

      You disintegrate. One sorry bit at a time.


'But I like it....' 
by Ashwin Calvin


Mick can’t get no satisfaction.

        His wife refuses to give him 40 licks.

        He starts rolling and gets stoned instead.


(For those who don't get the above story, here's a clue: Rolling Stones)


'Thought Provoker' 
by Ashwin Calvin


Change your thoughts, and your emotions will change.

        “I don't miss her!!” he thought.

        "ARRRGGHHHH!! "

        Score: Thoughts=0 Emotions=13


'Peek-a-boo' 
by Ashwin Calvin


He smiled to himself as he heard the hurriedly retreating footsteps of his nosy boss. She had obviously    seen his desktop image.




Well thats all fro now folks, waiting to hear your comments!! Have a good day!!!

So what are we working for again....?

The LAKHPATI Beggars of Mumbai ..... Dont miss the last one !!

NAME: Massu or Malana, 60
Massu's Assets :

Rs 30 lakh in properties alone
Day's earnings Rs 1,000 to 1,500 
 
Begs at: Lokhandwala. . Mostly outside high-end restaurants visited by TV and film stars. 
Working hours: 8 pm to 3 am . 
Home is: A 1 BHK at Amboli in Andheri (west). He owns another 1 BHK nearby.
Massu's 1BHK room at Amboli. Both houses are duplexes 
Family: Wife, two sons and a daughter-in- law share the apartment with him. 
Day's earnings: Rs 1000 to 1500. 
Assets: Rs 30 lakh in just properties. One son makes and sells brooms, while the other hawks knick-knacks near Andheri station . He has substantial savings, but would not reveal details. 

Cool quotient: Massu is dressed in spotless clothes when he takes an auto-rickshaw to Lokhandwala every evening. He changes into his beggar attire near Ad Labs. During his working hours, he has a complete sway over the area. You will never find another beggar in his vicinity. He takes an auto on his way home too. Stops at Yashraj Studios for a change of clothes.

NAME: Krishna Kumar Gite, 42
Krishna 's Assets
Rs 5 lakh in properties alone
Day's earnings
Rs 1500 to 2000 
 
Begs at: CP Tank, Charni Road 
Working hours: Early morning to late evening
Home is: I BHK apartment at Nallasopara, which he shares with his brother.
Family: Brother, sister-in-law and their children.
Day's earnings: Rs 1500 to 2000. 
His worth: The Nallasopara apartment is worth nearly Rs 5 lakh. Krishna claimed he has substantial savings but would not put a figure to it. 'My brother manages everything,' he said. 

Cool quotient: Claims he can't be bothered with money matters. He retires every evening to his Nallasopara home and hands over the day's earnings to his brother. 'My bhabhi and brother know best what to do with the money.' 

NAME: Bharat Jain, 45
Bharat's Assets
Rs 70 lakh in properties alone
Day's earnings Rs 2000 to 2500 
Begs at: Azad Maidan and Chhatrapati Shivaji Terminus . 
Working hours: Early morning to late evening. 
Home is: Two adjacent 1 BHK apartments in Parel, where his family stays. Bharat, however, visits home only once in a week. His family, which deals in school notebooks and other study material, has tried on many occasions to get Bharat to give up begging and join the family business.

Bharat's Parel house where he stays with his family. (right) The Bhandup shop the family has rented out to a juice centre 
Family: Wife, two sons -- one studying in class X and the other in class XII -- father and brother. 
Day's earnings: Rs 2000 to 2500. 
His worth: The family apartments are worth close to Rs 60 lakh. The family also has rented out a shop in Bhandup to a juice centre and gets Rs 7,000-a-month in rent. The rent is collected every month by Bharat's wife. 

Cool quotient: Bharat speaks impeccable English. He is soft spoken and you will never find him harassing people for alms.

Name: Haji, 26
Haji's Assets Rs 15 lakh
Day's earnings Rs 1000 to 2000

Begs at: Deonar and Chembur. Usually begs near mosques and
temples. 
Working hours: Flexi. Picks the best time to be at a temple or a mosque. 
Home is: A room at Cheetah Camp, where his mother and sister run a zari workshop, employing 15 people. 
Family: Mother and sister.. 
Day's earnings: Rs 1000 to 2000 .
Earnings increase mani-folds during festivals. 
His worth: The Cheetah Camp room worth anything between Rs 3 and 5 lakh. The zari workshop could be worth 10 lakh. The family earns a steady income from the zari business and his mother has tried every trick to get him to give up begging and join the family business. 

Cool quotient:

He says managing the zari workshop is too much
hardwork. 'I can't be bothered with all that. I like to be left alone.. Also, I make a decent amount every day.

------------ ----<( ULTIMATE!!! )>------------ ----- 
 


Name: Doesn't matter, A Software Engineer

S/W Enggr's Assets: Some old C++, Java, Cryptography Books worth 10,000 INR. Rest all Assets are based on EMI's (Easy Monthly Installment) so it's the bank that owns all his possesions untils his debts are cleared.

Day's earning: Peanuts, thrown at him by Space monkeys from high above

Works @ : Everywhere, Restroom inclusive.

Working Hours: Day and Night

Family: 1 intel Pentium 4 3.8 GHz CPU, 1 Flat monitor, 1 mouse and 1 keyboard.

His worth: Depends on the Tester, If tester files several critical bugs @ a time then he's useless :)

Cool Quotient: Whenever he opens his mouth he knows speaks only C, C++ and Mainframes,Java. Never fires anyone, only he gets fired everywhere. The only time he stays cool is when he gulps down two large shots of JD ( Jack Daniel , Obvious someone else is paying for those shots)

Reposted from a Buzz on My Gmail Account

Run Commands

As previously warned this blog is also a repository for information that i would otherwise misplace, but sometimes this information can come handy to all.  Over the past two plus years, my work with the sadistic Windows operating system has led me to compile a list of Run commands to make it easier to navigate around the clutter that is Billy Boy's money maker.  Here is a list of all that I have so far, to be updated as and when I get more.

You guys are welcome to add any more that you may have in the comments!!

Hope this helps!!!

To Access…	Run Command
Accessibility Controls	access.cpl
Accessibility Wizard	accwiz
Add Hardware Wizard	hdwwiz.cpl
Add/Remove Programs	appwiz.cpl
Administrative Tools	control admintools
Adobe Acrobat (if installed)	acrobat
Adobe Designer (if installed)	formdesigner
Adobe Distiller (if installed)	acrodist
Adobe ImageReady (if installed)	imageready
Adobe Photoshop (if installed)	photoshop
Automatic Updates	wuaucpl.cpl
Bluetooth Transfer Wizard	fsquirt
Calculator	calc
Certificate Manager	certmgr.msc
Character Map	charmap
Check Disk Utility	chkdsk
Clipboard Viewer	clipbrd
Command Prompt	cmd
Component Services	dcomcnfg
Computer Management	compmgmt.msc
Control Panel	control
Date and Time Properties	timedate.cpl
DDE Shares	ddeshare
Device Manager	devmgmt.msc
Direct X Control Panel (if installed)*	directx.cpl
Direct X Troubleshooter	dxdiag
Disk Cleanup Utility	cleanmgr
Disk Defragment	dfrg.msc
Disk Management	diskmgmt.msc
Disk Partition Manager	diskpart
Display Properties	control desktop
Display Properties	desk.cpl
Display Properties (w/Appearance Tab Preselected)	control color
Dr. Watson System Troubleshooting Utility	drwtsn32
Driver Verifier Utility	verifier
Event Viewer	eventvwr.msc
Files and Settings Transfer Tool	migwiz
File Signature Verification Tool	sigverif
Findfast	findfast.cpl
Firefox (if installed)	firefox
Folders Properties	folders
Fonts	control fonts
Fonts Folder	fonts
Free Cell Card Game	freecell
Game Controllers	joy.cpl
Group Policy Editor (XP Prof)	gpedit.msc
Hearts Card Game	mshearts
Help and Support	helpctr
HyperTerminal	hypertrm
Iexpress Wizard	iexpress
Indexing Service	ciadv.msc
Internet Connection Wizard	icwconn1
Internet Explorer	iexplore
Internet Properties	inetcpl.cpl
Internet Setup Wizard	inetwiz
IP Configuration (Display Connection Configuration)	ipconfig /all
IP Configuration (Display DNS Cache Contents)	ipconfig /displaydns
IP Configuration (Delete DNS Cache Contents)	ipconfig /flushdns
IP Configuration (Release All Connections)	ipconfig /release
IP Configuration (Renew All Connections)	ipconfig /renew
IP Configuration (Refreshes DHCP & Re-Registers DNS)	ipconfig /registerdns
IP Configuration (Display DHCP Class ID)	ipconfig /showclassid
IP Configuration (Modifies DHCP Class ID)	ipconfig /setclassid
Java Control Panel (if installed)	jpicpl32.cpl
Java Control Panel (if installed)	javaws
Keyboard Properties	control keyboard
Local Security Settings	secpol.msc
Local Users and Groups	lusrmgr.msc
Logs You Out Of Windows	logoff
Malicious Software Removal Tool	mrt
Microsoft Access (if installed)	msaccess
Microsoft Chat	winchat
Microsoft Excel (if installed)	excel
Microsoft Frontpage (if installed)	frontpg
Microsoft Movie Maker	moviemk
Microsoft Paint	mspaint
Microsoft Powerpoint (if installed)	powerpnt
Microsoft Word (if installed)	winword
Microsoft Syncronization Tool	mobsync
Minesweeper Game	winmine
Mouse Properties	control mouse
Mouse Properties	main.cpl
Nero (if installed)	nero
Netmeeting	conf
Network Connections	control netconnections
Network Connections	ncpa.cpl
Network Setup Wizard	netsetup.cpl
Notepad	notepad
Nview Desktop Manager (if installed)	nvtuicpl.cpl
Object Packager	packager
ODBC Data Source Administrator	odbccp32.cpl
On Screen Keyboard	osk
Opens AC3 Filter (if installed)	ac3filter.cpl
Outlook Express	msimn
Paint	pbrush
Password Properties	password.cpl
Performance Monitor	perfmon.msc
Performance Monitor	perfmon
Phone and Modem Options	telephon.cpl
Phone Dialer	dialer
Pinball Game	pinball
Power Configuration	powercfg.cpl
Printers and Faxes	control printers
Printers Folder	printers
Private Character Editor	eudcedit
Quicktime (If Installed)	QuickTime.cpl
Quicktime Player (if installed)	quicktimeplayer
Real Player (if installed)	realplay
Regional Settings	intl.cpl
Registry Editor	regedit
Registry Editor	regedit32
Remote Access Phonebook	rasphone
Remote Desktop	mstsc
Removable Storage	ntmsmgr.msc
Removable Storage Operator Requests	ntmsoprq.msc
Resultant Set of Policy (XP Prof)	rsop.msc
Scanners and Cameras	sticpl.cpl
Scheduled Tasks	control schedtasks
Security Center	wscui.cpl
Services	services.msc
Shared Folders	fsmgmt.msc
Shuts Down Windows	shutdown
Sounds and Audio	mmsys.cpl
Spider Solitare Card Game	spider
SQL Client Configuration	cliconfg
System Configuration Editor	sysedit
System Configuration Utility	msconfig
System File Checker Utility (Scan Immediately)	sfc /scannow
System File Checker Utility (Scan Once At The Next Boot)	sfc /scanonce
System File Checker Utility (Scan On Every Boot)	sfc /scanboot
System File Checker Utility (Return Scan Setting To Default)	sfc /revert
System File Checker Utility (Purge File Cache)	sfc /purgecache
System File Checker Utility (Sets Cache Size to size x)	sfc /cachesize=x
System Information	msinfo32
System Properties	sysdm.cpl
Task Manager	taskmgr
TCP Tester	tcptest
Telnet Client	telnet
Tweak UI (if installed)	tweakui
User Account Management	nusrmgr.cpl
Utility Manager	utilman
Windows Address Book	wab
Windows Address Book Import Utility	wabmig
Windows Backup Utility (if installed)	ntbackup
Windows Explorer	explorer
Windows Firewall	firewall.cpl
Windows Magnifier	magnify
Windows Management Infrastructure	wmimgmt.msc
Windows Media Player	wmplayer
Windows Messenger	msmsgs
Windows Picture Import Wizard (need camera connected)	wiaacmgr
Windows System Security Tool	syskey
Windows Update Launches	wupdmgr
Windows Version (to show which version of windows)	winver
Windows XP Tour Wizard	tourstart
Wordpad	write